


Breathe Into Me

by DarkledMind



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Aftercare, Belts, Breathplay, Do Not Archive (The Magnus Archives), Dom/sub, Frottage, Hair-pulling, Impact Play, Light Bondage, M/M, Masochism, Mildly Dubious Consent, Multiple Orgasms, Overstimulation, Purple Prose, Self-Indulgent, Sex Toys, Sub Drop, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings, sub space
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:54:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28004991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkledMind/pseuds/DarkledMind
Summary: Jon does not know what he wants, but Elias does. Elias wants to make Jon Know, and See, whether he wants to or not. There is fire and ice in his veins, and only one thing to soothe it. Elias knows he wants it, he just has to push a little.
Relationships: Elias Bouchard/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist
Comments: 16
Kudos: 82





	Breathe Into Me

It feels so foreign and invasive, but then Elias hits that spot inside of him, and he gasps. Warmth radiates through him. His cock twitches. He doesn't want it to, but it does. Then Elias hits it again, and again. There are these soft, pleased sounds slipping through his lips. Jon clenches the sheets in frustration. No, no, no, it isn't supposed to feel this good. His chest rises and falls with panting breaths. 

It is building. In the curl of his toes, in a static brimming through his whole body, it is building. Is he going to come? No, he doesn't want to. Things complicate after an orgasm. Right now all he wants is skin on skin. Hands digging into his thighs. The strange but lovely feeling of a cock inside him. His whole body feels warm, feels tense. Elias touches him again and it feels like fire blooming on his skin, and inside of him, where the head of his lover's cock rubs along that tender spot. Are they lovers? Is that what this is? Then that hand moves to wrap around his cock. All the air leaves Jon, like he has been hit. "Oh, God," he whispers. It feels so good but it shouldn't. Nothing should feel this good. Fucking Elias is wrong in so many ways but it feels so right. 

No, no, no. He is getting closer, closer to the edge, to the peak. He doesn’t want to go, to reach the edge and fall.

"Good, good," Elias hums in praise. His hips fuck against Jon, and he buries his face into the pillow with shame. Jon tries to muffle himself because how can he not? The noises he makes, oh how he hates them. They spill from his mouth, tangled with desperate gasps for air. Elias makes a noise, a satisfied exhalation. His rhythm changes. Is he close too? Are they going to come together? Jon still doesn't want to come. The thought terrifies him. He just gets closer the more Elias touches him, the more Elias fucks him. 

He is practically holding his breath in fear now. It is just too much. It feels like too much. The glow starts to fade away into something more palatable, more reasonable, and less overwhelming. 

Good, he wasn't going to come. He sighs a breath of relief. 

Elias pulls out, lets go of his cock. There is a longing where Elias was on his cock, and inside him. It is a loving, soft thing that makes his knees weak. Love. Sex is not love. He collapses as soon as Elias is no longer inside of him. Did Elias come? The thought makes a little glow swell. Jon doesn't want to come, but there is the thought of Elias leaving him there, now, covered in sweat, full of Elias's seed, yet still aching for more. Well, it sounds just about the nicest outcome of this whole debacle. 

Of course, Jon isn't so lucky. 

"Roll over." 

Jon obeys, half out of his mind with pleasure. He is on his back, legs spread for Elias, and it is humiliating. He hates feeling like this. It's much easier just to avoid sex entirely than to feel open, and vulnerable, and wanting. He is always wanting, wanting more and more.

He doesn't know what he wants.

Jon focuses his eyes after a moment. Elias is clearly not done, or if he did finish, he was ready to go again. He sees the look Elias gives him, and is caught in his gaze. Those piercing eyes, that tear him apart and put him back together. He isn’t breathing. He doesn’t need air.

“You’re going to make me work for it, aren’t you?” Elias runs a hand up Jon’s chest, through the fine dark hairs that smatter there, over the top of pockmarked scars. He doesn’t look up to Jon’s eyes anymore, but the absolute reverence in his gaze as he so lovingly runs his hands over Jon makes Jon turn his head. The hand that has been caressing his chest moves down to his stomach, across his hips. Jon writhes, alight with pleasure. Just being touched like this, and by him, it feels so good. Jon had not fucked many people, but his short encounters were nothing compared to this. Every touch from Elias lit Jon up in the worst way. Elias wraps a hand around his cock. Jon gasps, and hates himself even more.

“Compel me,” Elias orders as he strokes Jon. Jon can’t take it, the little looks, the tone in his voice, and he definitely cannot take how good the hand wrapped around him feels. 

He slaps Elias away, scrambles back on the bed and closes his legs. “What are you going to do to me?” he throws power into his voice.

Elias smiles, followed by a little huff of a laugh. He rolls a shoulder back, lets the compulsion flow through him like a wave. His eyes flutter closed, and he enjoys himself. Disgust boils inside Jon. This is wrong. This is wrong. He wants to leave, to run away from the pleasure, and the touches, and the glow in his chest. Maybe, just maybe, what he hears will make him actually get the courage up to leave.

Elias opens his eyes, smiles. “I am going to make you come, at least once, hopefully twice. Whether you like it or not.”

Jon scoffs, wraps his arms around his middle protectively. He says nothing, looks away from him. Elias shuffles off the bed. Maybe he will leave Jon alone long enough for him to throw on some clothes and escape. Jon still has hope. This was a bad idea. This wasn’t actually what he wanted.

There is a soft clicking that catches Jon’s attention. He looks back over to Elias, who has picked up his belt from the scattered remains of what started out as kissing. There were so many kisses, soft, sweet, and hungry. It had felt right. He thought this was what he wanted, but no. He was an idiot for letting this happen. Really, he should probably stop this right now. “What are you doing with that?” He feels the power flow through his voice, honeyed with the breathless gasping of someone who felt too much.

After a shudder, Elias comes back to the bed. “I’m going to tie you up with my belt. For a start.” He smirks, and moves towards Jon.

Jon’s heart drops into his stomach. Elias looks hungry, as he stalks prey. It scares him. "No, no, nonono." He tries to scramble, and gets halfway off the bed. Elias has longer arms, grabs a handful of greying hair, and yanks. Jon grunts as he is thrown back on the bed. He locks eyes with Elias, a glare, a threat. Elias just smiles, cocks his head to the side, looking amused and curious. He grabs Jon’s wrists and pins them above his head. “Now, behave.”

Jon behaves. He wiggles slightly, once he is bound, testing the belt. It’s firm, and digs into his skin. This might be agreeable. He almost likes this. Elias runs a hand down Jon's chest, before he gets off the bed once more. "Stay there."

Jon groans in annoyance, rolls his eyes. "You're such an ass." Elias just laughs. He tests the belt again, tugging and twisting. Maybe if he could get loose. Then what? Would Elias let him go? If not, would he run? He didn't know the building, and Elias was faster, stronger than him. He would probably find himself in the same position regardless. He agreed to this in the first place, and he might as well finish.

With a new found resolve to not enjoy himself whatsoever, Jon huffs and settles in for the worst. 

"Aha, there it is," Elias says. Jon glares in his general direction. Elias is holding a black ring of silicone.

Jon laughs sardonically. "A cockring?"

Elias smirks, twists it in his fingers, "A vibrating cockring. I thought you might enjoy yourself more with some..." he pauses, thinks, "Some assistance." He kneels on the bed with a bounce. "Now. Spread your legs."

Jon pauses for a moment, and makes sure to cast the most devastating look he can before opening his legs for Elias Bouchard. Elias smiles, and settles happily between his thighs. He stretches the ring over Jon. There is a breath of hesitation, as Jon prepares for what is to come. The ring of silicone is tight. An ache builds, something decidedly different than he had ever experienced before. There is still, ever present, an itch, a curiosity. He takes a breath as Elias clicks on the vibrator.

"Oh, fuck." Pleasure shoots through his veins like ice. It almost hurts but it feels good. His back arches. The leather groans as he pulls on the belt. Elias presses their hips together, brushes their cocks together. Elias hums in approval and grinds against his stomach, rutting against Jon. It's so much to take in, to feel. The primal urge, the heat around him, he holds his breath, hopes that maybe he can breathe when it is all over. His whole body is tense, and this is so new, so different. He did not know what he expected, but this was not it.

Elias places a hand on his chest, strokes up to hold Jon's face lovingly. It is such a gentle touch, and even that feels too much. His touch is fire to soothe the ice in his veins. The vibrations don't even feel good. It just is, and it almost feels like breaking. Something is going to give He is scared, terrified of the pure pleasure shooting through him.

Seconds pass slowly. It isn't stopping. The thrum of the vibrator pulses through his cock, and it feels so much better than he ever could have expected. The ring of silicone makes him impossibly harder. He wants more, aches more. Jon takes a shallow breath, without really exhaling. He grits his teeth. It's so much. He doesn't want this. He never expected it to feel good. He expected the shame, and the guilt, but never did he think he would actually, genuinely enjoy this.

Elias sweeps his thumb over Jon's cheek bone. "Breathe."

Jon obeys, and exhales, slowly, in shaky bursts. He moans, arches his back, tries to pull back his hips. It is futile, and is made worse as Elias rubs up, and down, and all around him. Jon resists, pulls on the belt and squirms, trying to pull away but always followed be Elias. The belt cuts into his wrists and his muscles strain. He manages to hide his face in his arm, to muffle the moan and hide in shame as he thrusts into Elias's hand.

Elias pets his cheek, even as Jon pants into his arm. "Good," he praises, affection laced in his voice. "Doesn't that feel good, Jon?" He shivers and gasps as Elias rubs his thumb in circles over the head of Jon's cock. Precum leaks from his tip, and slicks his thumb and Elias's stomach.

Jon focuses on his breath now that he remembers how to breathe. His whole body is alight, shaking with pleasure. "Oh my God." He thrusts, without meaning to, because he doesn't want this, he doesn't know what he wants, just that he wants. There is a pathetic cry. He is humiliated by his pleasure, by his sounds. He presses further, but Elias pulls back. Jon whines in disapproval. He wanted more, he wanted to feel. He doesn't want this. He can't want this, because if he wants this, he might actually be a monster. Elias rolls his hips down, warms Jon up again. Jon is ashamed, but he still enjoys himself. His chest warms with desire. Jon groans, ending stuck in his throat. It becomes too much, and his hips twitch forward, hard. 

Elias chuckles, "My, you're so reactive." He adjusts to sitting up again, leaving even more want behind. He pulls him into his lap, and slides back inside Jon like a key into a lock. Jon would have screamed if he had the air, but it comes out as an unsteady gasp. This all just feels so good. Thoughts start to slip away into fuzzy blackness. 

Elias starts to move in long and slow press of his hips. He is searching, experimenting. Jon is too, even though he is far away right now. He knows about that spot inside of him, and he helps move his hips so Elias can find that bundle of nerves. And they do, together. As Jon moves one way, Elias moves another, and they finally click into place. 

Jon squeezes his thighs around Elias, shivers with an airy sound. He isn't ashamed anymore. He isn't scared anymore. He just wants to know what this will feel like. Elias hums with delight, "There?" Jon nods, swallows. His mouth is dry. 

Elias and Jon move together once more, seeing if they can replicate what just happened. Jon moans, a needy, deep sound. Elias rocks his hips and they hit it together, again, and again, more, and more. It's slow, it's deliberate, and it feels so, so good. Nothing has felt this good. Of all people, it had to be Elias.

Then it is building again. More than just a soft glow, but this time it is a hot pit, burning through his mind. Jon doesn't care anymore. He rocks up to his hand, down onto his cock. "Elias," he insists. "Elias, it feels..." He can't think straight.

"How does it feel, Jon?" Elias uses his free hand to guide Jon down, hard enough for his vision to darken.

"Feels," he swallows, "it feels good." Jon nods, and is surprised with himself. He means it. The bite of the leather in his wrists, the overwhelming feeling of the vibrator, the fullness inside of him. "It feels so good," he says between breaths.

"Wonderful." Then Elias fucks him apart, until Jon feels the world falls around them. All that matters is how their bodies match together. 

Which of course, is exactly what Elias wanted.

There is a long period there where Jon can see stars. He can almost map constellations in them, they are so bright. They blur, and fade, and twinkle, and every inch of him simply melts into Elias. He is aware that he is making embarrassing sounds, but all modesty is gone, and he barely registers them.

Elias picks up the pace. Each thrust drags against the light, the pleasure inside him, and pushes Jon into the bed with force. It impossibly keeps going. His orgasm drags on, far longer than he ever expected. In those few moments after he spills over, when Elias is fucking him with a vibrator on his cock, he thinks of nothing, and only enjoys how they feel together.

But the pleasure drains and something else burns inside him. It hurts. He thought it hurt before but that was nothing compared to now. It isn’t just pain. There is pleasure too. Each shock of it leaves a sting that follows in waves with immense pleasure. Instinctively he moves away, tilts his hips and shoves his feet into the bed. But Elias pins Jon’s knee by his head. Jon tries, but he cannot move as Elias fucks him.

Jon yells in protest. It comes out as a weak mewl. “Elias,” he tries, another pathetic whine. “Stop.” He tries so hard to sound more confident than he is. In truth his brain is numb with the pain and the pleasure.

Elias slams into Jon with particular force, wringing a cry from him. “You don't actually want that.” 

Jon can't think, can hardly exist with all this pleasure. He whines, pleads without words. He tries again squirm away, but Elias squeezes his thigh, and fucks him harder. "What lovely sounds you make," he purrs. 

Jon whines again in protest to the praise. No no this is bad. There is pain. He doesn't like pain, but the mix of pleasure and pain continues, wrapping around his mind and his cock. "Fuck," he moans, and he sounds absolutely debauched. Panting, moaning, pleading whispers between it all. Small sounds of "Please," and "Oh, God," and even once, Elias's name pours from his lips, more a prayer than anything he has ever said before. 

Elias slams into Jon hard with the prayer. He practically growls, snaps his hips forward, and groans. Despite his arousal, he stops. Without leaving, he undoes the belt around Jon's wrists. Jon brings them down to look at the wide, red marks. He runs his thumbs over them, and shudders. He forces back the urge to lick.

With the shudder though, he is fully aware that Elias is still inside him, and watching. Dark eyes meet light as their gazes lock. Elias takes Jon's wrists so gently, with such love, and kisses them. Jon shudders again, clenches around Elias, and they both gasp with a shared breath. There is a moment where they breathe together, and all that matters is how their chests rise and fall in rhythm. 

This, this is what Elias wanted.

"Roll over," Elias commands as he pulls out of Jon.

"What, you--" he is cut short when the belt comes down with a crack on his thigh. He takes a deep breath, arches his back. The sting burns through him, with that same ice as before. The vibrator on his cock is still going, keeping him hard and wanting. 

Elias pets the spot he hit, skin blushing and sensitive. His touch burns as Elias pets the mark. "Did it feel right, Jon?"

Oh, no.

Oh, it did feel good.

Jon shakes with a soft sob. He does not want to cry. "Yes," he says, and the tears flow from his eyes.

"Good," and Elias hits him. A crack, a gasp, a small moan, and a hum of approval. Twice more, same spot, and it hurts, but still feels good. Jon is too engulfed in pleasure to feel shame.

"Now. Roll over." Shaking, eyes wet, Jon obeys. He knows to keep his ass in the air, ready for Elias. 

This is what Jon wants, to be open, and ready, and wanting, to be forced, and taken where he dare not tread alone. And used, he wanted so badly to be used. His chest tightens, and lets out a sob.

Elias gently pulls his hair back, strokes his neck and shoulders, then wraps the belt around Jon's throat.

Jon gasps and his hand goes for the belt. Elias digs his nails into Jon's hip, pulls the belt tight. "Behave." 

Jon behaves. He lowers his hand. Elias pets his side, and enters him. He sighs, and his own breath shakes, shudders out of him. Jon feels known. Jon feels scared. One hand is guiding Jon, the other is on the belt. There is a tug, and it is tighter around his neck. He can still breathe, but every breath is a gift, that Elias is allowing him to breathe. 

It all excites him. It shouldn't, but it does. He has his own cum on his stomach, hot, and sticky, and dripping, and disgusting. His cock is painfully hard. His wrists ache. At any time, Elias can cut off his air supply. Above all else he is open. His ass is being fucked mercilessly, and he feels thoroughly used. He feels shame, but the pleasure far outweighs it. So he lets his shame pass by, and he enjoys being fucked. He hates it, but he loves it more. His thoughts start to melt into stripes.

The belt tightens. It leaves Jon dizzy, panting. His breath sticks in his throat, claws into his chest. Jon is close again to his edge. It hurts. He is oversensitive, raw. He can feel everything. Everything. So much. He can feel The Eye on him, waiting. A tape recorder clicks. It hurts. He is scared, terrified. And yet he feels a bright, hot, white heat boring inside him, around him. His toes curl, and he tries to breathe but can't. The belt is tight, and getting tighter, and tighter.

He starts to slip. He sees stars again, chases them, reaches, and falls. He falls hard with a choked, gagging sound. Drool runs down the corner of his mouth, down his lips, over his chin. He is still being fucked, and that light inside him is burning, burning. 

Elias's hips stutter, slam into Jon one final time. Then it is all over. The belt goes slack, and Jon can breathe. His body shakes with adrenaline, and he coughs, harder and harder as air rushes back into his lungs. He is aware of cum covering his back. He is painted, drawn just how Elias wanted. His ears stop ringing, and he can hear Elias's own heavy breathing. He sounds satiated. Jon realizes he, too, is satisfied. There was a depth in his bones, a oneness with his own body that he hasn't felt in so long.

Elias turns off the vibrator. He removes the cockring, and Jon finally goes soft. He is no longer wanting, and he is soft an pliant. He wants to collapse, but there is a hand on his hips, keeping him upright. Elias leans, grabs a handful of tissues, and cleans Jon. His hands stroke, with soft hushes that soothe Jon's burning mind.

"There you go. Relax, now. Breathe." Jon falls into the bed, and inhales. He feels vulnerable, and trembles. He has never felt so seen, so known. It was terrifying, more than once, but he feels so good. This was worth it. 

There is a hum of a tape recorder.

Elias lays down next to him on the bed. He throws his hands above his head, and looks very pleased with himself. Jon peeks from the pillow to watch the rise and fall of his Elias's chest. He wants nothing more than to tuck into his side, and be held. He decides then, that they are lovers. It makes him feel queasy, but seen, and known.

Elias reaches out, and starts to absently pet Jon's hair. Jon closes his eyes, sighs. There is a moment of peace between them, where Jon doesn't think of anything in particular.

"I love you," Elias says. 

Jon jolts up, and stares. His brain is too numb to do anything, to comprehend. Elias seems so casual, so sure of himself. Even when Jon tells himself that no, this is wrong, there is some part of him that disagrees. There is another part that just doesn't care, because he enjoyed himself. He had never truly enjoyed sex before. Some small part of him said this is what he deserved. He loved it, he realizes.

Elias looks to Jon like a lazy cat. Sunlight streaks above his high cheekbones. His eyes are cast in fire, and Jon is lost in them. Elias speaks again, gentle, but so insistent, "And you love me too."

Jon breaks his gaze with pointed effort. He stares at the pillow. A thousand thoughts run through his mind. None of them stick. "I-- I can't," he says as he rolls over, away from Elias. 

There is a creeping dread in Jon's chest, a vibrating energy building along the surface of his skin. The bed next to him shifts. Elias places a hand on Jon's shoulder, squeezes, and caresses. Lips follow in soft, tender kisses. A pleasant tingle is left behind. Jon realizes, Knows, that the loving, affectionate passion from before was still there. The kisses that escalated into a belt around his throat were not diminished with the acts they had committed. The sex was amazing, rough, powerful. It was no less love making, even as he pain and Fear moved through him with each oppressing wave of his orgasms. The tension fades. Elias presses into his mind, makes him See. He Knows how it is to be worshipped, to be adored. He sobs, the sound pressing out of his throat in sputters. His throat is raw. His chest is tight.

"You love me." Elias runs his hand down Jon's side. He squeezes his hip and that fire is there, warming him now without a burn. He is loved.

"No." Jon hopes aloud, because how can he not? It is shameful. He really shouldn't. He tries to talk himself out of falling in love.

Elias tucks Jon's hair back, to expose his neck. There is a sensitive spot, made hot by the belt mark, and Elias kisses it. Jon shivers. The sound he makes is purely pathetic. Elias practically purrs in approval. He grabs Jon's hair, and pulls, firm and commanding. Jon tilts his head back immediately, obeys. His back arches. Elias puts his hand on Jon's stomach, and presses their bodies together. "Say you love me."

Jon can't believe how peaceful this feels. Every inch of him is warm, almost burns. It feels like something broken inside him has fallen into place. He is scared. His breath is unsteady. Yet he is flying. He looks inside of him, to find strength, to find the resolve to say no.

He doesn't find it. Instead, he finds something else. He finds truth.

"I love you, Elias," and he means it. He is crying still. Only quiet tears drip down his cheeks. 

Elias lets go of his hair. "Good." He wipes the tears away, kisses the shell of his ear. "Very good, Archivist." 

They lay there for another moment, as Jon's cries in terror of the Truth. Elias whispers, pets him, calms him from his fit. Jon shivers, and emotion moves through him with power. He starts to shake. He is hyperventilating. He wraps in on himself, curls, and sobs. His throat is raw and the cries claw from his throat like spiders with angry hooks and sharp fangs.

Elias sits up on an elbow. "Here, here." He tucks them under the covers. The heavy duvet settles onto Jon. The sheets are clean, and smell like the sun. Jon knows it is just fabric softener. Elias presses his head into the back of Jon's neck. "There. All tucked in," he whispers. His voice is soft, husky. Jon can smell them, the musk of their horrible, wonderful passion. Elias kisses the back of Jon's neck, moving down his shoulder. He breathes his love into Jon, cloying and warm as it is dark. Jon gasps, shudders one last time as a wave of something masochistic flowed through him. 

He enjoyed himself, and he is in love. 

His shakes start to slow, and he settles. His breathing is harsh, but it slows. Elias pets his shoulder. He runs his fingers over the worm scars that litter Jon's body. He runs his thumb over the Mark in his shoulder, and down to where two ribs are missing. Then back up to pet the scar on his throat, the skin is still sensitive from the belt.

"You have come so far, Jon. And look at you. You're beautiful."

Jon believes him.

Which is exactly what Elias wanted.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

The tape recorder shuts off.

**Author's Note:**

> The reason why Elias pauses halfway is because he is edging himself. This is so he comes with Jon, because Jon thinks it is romantic. :3c


End file.
